This week will hopefully be a quick one, I have Thursday off to attend one "V"'s unit functions and then next week I am completely off so I can spend the first half of "V"'s leave with him. The kid's were going to go to away camp for that week, but they've already been gone to much I'd rather have them stay with us. It's amazing how they can drive me crazy and the second their gone I want them to come back so fast!! It's the same with "V" he drives me nuts, but the minute he's gone I'm going to want him to come back immediately.
It's amazing how far we've come I realized recently, years ago I would have never felt as secure in my marriage as I do now. Years ago I never really believed that V and I would be together forever, we were young and boy did we have our problems. These days my marriage is what I wanted it to be from the beginning. And this is where I hate the fact that he's leaving.
My best friend will be leaving for 15 months and I'm not really sure how to deal with the loss because truly that's what it is, a loss. There are grieving periods and then periods where you know you can make it and then they come home for their R&R and you forget it all for the few short days their home, only to go through the grieving process all over again.
There are all these crazy statistics out there about how these long deployments are very harmful to the mental health of soldiers and their families and yet still we send them out there to live in constant awareness and fear for 15 months. I know that for 15 months my husband will be on edge non-stop. He will come home and not be the same person who left 15 months before. I know that the kids and I will live in constant fear for 15 months, worrying about the possibility that our biggest fear could come true.
So why is it that we really need to go through all of this? Do they really think we're all that strong?