Is it my turn yet??

I think as a military wife I have a few more obstacles and hurdles to jump over than civilian wives. I'm not saying I'm better just that my life is a bit more unique.

Yesterday I received call from my husband telling me that our son was suspended from school. This is my oldest son, the one who is so sweet and mild mannered, the one I really worry about the most. He has a weight problem, but we're working on it. Kids can be so cruel and I guess he just had enough yesterday and hit someone. In all honesty I'm not mad. The things this other child said to my child had tears in my eyes. I wanted to hit him also. So for the first time and hopefully the last he is suspended from school until Monday.

This got me to thinking though, maybe I shouldn't work outside the home anymore. Maybe I should be at home with them baking cookies and being Suzy homemaker. Maybe while the hubster is deployed I should not work and only work when he is home so I can make sure they have my un-interrupted attention.

I talked to a friend of mine yesterday who is also a working military wife, she found a note in her daughters room from someone saying she gave good blow jobs and she is now on birth control. Her daughter is 14. I don't know why this surprises me when I think how old I was when I started having sex, but it shocks and scares me for my children. She like me has now started thinking that maybe while her husband is deployed she shouldn't be working. This is my biggest fear that I will not do enough to prevent my children from getting an AIDS or using drugs, like all parents I want so much for them.

Why do we feel this would make a difference that when our husbands are gone, why wouldn't we just be stay at home moms all of the time? Somehow I have this added guilt that I brought my children into a life where not only does their mom work, but their Dad will miss a year + of their life on numerous occasions.

Just one more of the wonderful things I get to think about as we start this deployment.