Wednesday, January 21, 2009

You don't have to relate... it's cool

My life is filled with acronyms.

Almost 14 years ago when I married my husband I quickly found out that I was going to have to learn a whole new language, not because we were moving to a foreign country...well maybe we were because being a Military Spouse I've learned is it's own culture and almost like living on another planet.

Having grown up in a purely "civilian" household and never having been around any type of military I was in complete "culture shock". People threw words at me like, PX, FTX, TDY, PCS, LES, and I had no idea what they were talking about...but I quickly learned. I threw myself into my new role as military spouse because my mother taught me one of the most important lessons I could ever learn and that was to do your homework and know what you're talking about. I hate appearing like an idiot so I jumped in with 2 feet I asked questions and investigated and within 6 months I was the FSG Leader (Family Support Group) and I was helping other spouses learn what services were available and planning get togethers.

Now as we get ready for another hectic and almost last moves and a slight change from what I can tell from our "normal" duty stations, I've realized that we are institutionalized. I can't imagine what our life's will be like when we are no longer an "Army" family, I mean how do you make friends in the real world if Uncle Sam is not there to provide them? What do you mean my husband will be around all day everyday and never ever go to the field ( a chance for us both to have a break), we won't be attending balls every time we turn around?? What a strange strange life it will be, and as crazy as it sounds, at least to other military wives, I don't think I will like it.


  1. When my best friend and her family went back into civilian life after her husband was injured in Iraq, they had a difficult time transitioning. A VERY difficult time. The lack of separation - you know, that thing everyone always complains about? - was the most difficult for them. Having her hubby around constantly meant they fought a lot more.

    When my husband got out of the Marines, the kids and I transitioned just fine. I was never the traditional military wife, only having been married for 3 years while he was in, and living off base. Tai, however, was in for 13 years, and he is STILL having a difficult time with it.

    For example, he was used to being at work every single weekday, period. Once he got a job in the civilian world, he realized he could call in sick. And he did. A lot.

    More importantly, he has a difficult time with the lack of meaning in his work. In the USMC, he was the guy who delivered all of the important information to the Commandant, the senate, the secretary of defense, etc.. If it happened in the Marine Corps, and they needed to know about it - he made that happen. It was important.

    He's jumped from job to job here, not finding anything meaningful enough to motivate him. He is now going to school to become a special education teacher. Hopefully, that will have enough meaning to keep him motivated.

  2. That's kind of what scares me as well, I mean obviously the structure in the Army is what helps and the meaning it gives them can't hurt either. I have a feeling we will always be associated with the Army even when we're gone, he'll probably be a contractor of some sort, so we'll never be to far, of course that be after he puts probably 30 years in, lol.